How to Prepare for Rejection - Part 1

We all have them. Us writers call them "possibilities" or "projects" or even better yet: "proposals". The little leads we have that we send to agents and/or editors and then breathe not a word for fear we'll jynx it, or reveal some confidential something that will tarnish potential relationships and contracts. Wise. Very wise. Mums the word. But the fact is, if you're a writer actively pursuing publication, we all spend our time networking - using our precious manuscripts as the pitch.

Rejection is coming. Like Darth Vader threatened Luke Skywalker - "I am your father" (add: "and I don't care how badly it feels - I don't want you"). Or when Cinderella's stepmother handed her a broom and said "sweep" (add: "you wicked, wicked child I never asked for"). However rejection is disguised, we eventually see the truth. Maybe in the form of a letter, a phone call, an email, or a face to face. Rejection - sucks.

So how does one prepare for rejection without being the proverbial half-glass-full writer who sees failure in every corner and fails to enjoy the process of being -- a writer?

My Dad told me I was a gifted writer -- ever since I wrote my first full manuscript at thirteen. Of course, I'm gifted. I'm his daughter. All daughters are gifted. Daddy's have glasses that sprout roses out the nose pieces. So when you grow up and realize that Twilight may be making its author millions and -- you're not the author, it's a hard dose of reality. Although, some of us may place the argument that the author of Twilight is not gifted she's just -- lucky. My personal opinion after I yawned all the way from chapter one to "the end".

Luck? Gifted? God? What pushes a writer past the big fat red REJECTION into the world of a successful writer?

I like Pinterest. It's an intriguing website -- complete with a plot line of potential copyright infringement. So as we all dodge the Internet police who will eventually file a massive lawsuit against us for stealing a picture off of some obscure website in Japan ... I'm enthralled by the many craft projects on that site. There's a quilted owl that would be adorable in my new baby's room. But then, I can't sew. And, don't bring up the idea of a hot glue gun. I can't figure those out either. So in reality, I look at various potential hobbies and as myself -- when is it time to hang up the towel? Close the laptop lid? Paper shred the manuscript? Move on to a simpler hobby like -- sewing?

So? How do we prepare for rejection and still be a happy writer who can smile at their MacBook? (Or in my case, a Dell Vostro which let me tell you, kicks patootie!). Will we ever get past rejection and see our dreams fulfilled? What does rejection tell us about ourselves?

Are you irritated that I keep asking questions and don't answer any? Welcome to the life of an unpublished writer. Just when you think one is answered, another pops up until you're plagued with questions. Which is why this week I want to answer these three questions in bolded black above.

So until tomorrow's heart-throbbing question -- what questions plague you in relation to potential rejection? And how have you answered them?

Week Off ...

If you haven't been able to tell - I'm taking the week off of blogging. Leave it to me to remember to post this halfway through the week! LOL

Putting together queries for agents and working on getting a chunk of my next WIP written. Prayers appreciated as the last few nights have been early mornings and then the last few days at work have been -- early mornings. Hmmm.... so this ready-to-explode Mama hasn't gotten a lot accomplished besides sleep a few hours and hit the floor running ...

(I just described all our lives, didn't I?) :)

How to Write Believable Male Characters - Part II

Great feedback yesterday! I never thought of a male character crying at a death. Ok fine. I'll make allowance for those tears.

I sat in on a class once led by Randy Ingermanson about the Male POV. It was enlightening to be sure. The class came with warnings about content, but I wasn't offended in the slightest. Randy had so much great stuff to think about and let's face it, men and women's POV's are different. (Which is why we make such amazing teams! - trust me. I've managed people for ten years now and if I had a choice, my team would be primarily male - simply because they compliment a female leader well and give a different, typically, non-emotional, reaction). That was a really long parenthesis.

A few things to make a better male lead:

1. Think black and white. Sure. You have your occasional super emotional guy, but then, no offense, men, they don't typically make for strong male leads. In the real world, we can see through the emotion to the strength beneath, but overly sensitive and reactive men in a story tend to be the milksops (in historical terms). By black and white, we mean: decisive. opinionated. unafraid. strong. confident. charming. Think black and white adjectives where you don't need another adjective to describe the adjective. 
2. Think cracked. Take the ever-popular Mr. Darcy from P&P. He was the embodiment of male aloofness. Superior. Even arrogant. But there was a crack. It was tiny, but Lizzie fit right through it. Every good male lead needs to be a bit cracked. Something that he needs to overcome.  A weakness. A fear? A struggle. This makes them human and frankly, likable to a female reader. 
3. Think physical. Okay. Here it comes. Men are men. (This is Randy had too much fun going on about :) When they look at a woman, they don't notice the taper of their blouse. They notice that the taper enhances their upper torso, or their curves. Who cares about the blouse! When they see a woman's lips, it's not to admire Maybelline shade #23 Rosemary Mint. They're trying to figure out what it would be like to consume the lips in a long, drawn out lip sucking moment. And within the confines of writing for a CBA market, we as writers have to get especially creative. We don't want lewd, sexual paragraphs of lust. However, we do need to be realistic. When his fingers brush her cheeks, she feels a deep sigh of tenderness and he wants t to release his pent up energy and dig his fingers into her hair hauling her to him in a caveman-like crush. Are there acceptable variances to this? Yes. But, simply stated, don't forget a guy is a guy. Or go for the dichotomy. He's totally oblivious to her. Anything physical for your heroine hasn't been awakened yet. Maybe he's simply appalled by her outspoken nature. That can kill a desire to eat those lips, I tell ya.

OK! I have a chiropractor appt.! This is such a fun post for me. Leave a comment as to what makes a great hero. We'll continue our chat later ...

How to Write Believable Male Characters - Part 1

One of my pet peeves as an avid reader over the years, are heroes who don't seem ... male. Sometimes this is achieved by the author intruding on his brain and inserting their own reactions were they in the situation. (assuming the author is female). It's sort of like watching a movie/TV show where the male lead doesn't know how to hold a gun correctly but he was supposedly trained by SWAT. It detracts from the believability.

A few things that typically turn me away from a male lead:

• A man who cries. Even under great strain or grief. Maybe it's because I'm not personally accustomed to this. I know it's not a weakness, but in a novel, it doesn't endear me. I know. I'm hard.
• A man who never notices the female's frame. I'm not looking for lewd writing, or lustful thoughts. Sheer appreciation of the curve of a woman's lips, or her waist, or eyes, or hips, for goodness' sakes. We don't need to dwell, but let's be realistic ...
• A man hems and haws. Maybe "hems and haws" is a mid-western term? Or old fashioned? Basically it means "indecisive". The men I've met who are indecisive aren't the hero type. Heroes, to me, are determined, strong-minded, opinionated. Even if they're wrong, they still make decisions firmly and soundly.
• A man who cannot control the heroine. Ok. Call me old fashioned. But, I don't like it when the heroine consistently bests the hero. I like a strong-minded heroine to get conquered by a bull-headed hero. At a minimum, butt heads a time or two before he puts her in her place. When the heroine runs all over him and he's nonplussed with what to do with her, I'm like "huh?" "really?".

So what makes a male character believable to you? Obviously, we all have different opinions. It's the same reason we married different men (thank goodness! :). Characteristics that are attractive or confirming as heroic vary from lady to lady. When you read a book, what spoils a hero for you?

How to Write During Flu Season

Has anyone else gotten hit hard by flu season this year? Notice the large gaps in my blog entries? Yes. Flu. 5th Time for me since January 2011. Yuk. And here I was bragging it up that I hadn't had the stomach flu in 10 years. What-ev-er. I won't be opening my big mouth any time soon.

But this time was different. I actually had writing DEADLINES! Yes, the dreaded word of all writers. It's easy to deal with writing when you don't have deadlines ... don't write - be sick. But when people are waiting for your best work, and you're camping out in the bathroom ... it's not a recipe for the next Jane Austin.

Here's a few things that I discovered - accidentally - that got me through AND helped me meet my deadlines (which I did ... thank you, Lord!):

1. Crit Partners. I know. I've harped about them all last week. Threw darts at their poster faces. Whined about their abusive natures. They. Saved. Me. I had so many edits to do and frankly, they did about 75% of them for me. Now, let me put that into perspective. They did not write my stuff. :) They took my stuff and helped me read through it pragmatically and editorially. One crit had me slice and dice an entire chapter. "It's not necessary" - she states. "It needs to be culled". Who uses a word like "cull"? Ok fine. I CULLED it and what do you know - it read better. Gee whiz. My other crit highlighted a thousand hyphens that weren't em-dashes. Who notices that stuff? She does. And my third crit pasted about equal amounts of criticisms to encouragement comments. Ahhh ... I save her's til last 'cause she's like the doctor who slices the wound but quick throws a bandaid over it and asks if you need a doughnut.  - my point? Aw gee, I needed ALL THREE. They each brought something different to my edits and I was VERY confident when I pressed "send". Not confident that I just wrote the next best-seller, but confident that I'd written MY best.
2. Text Messaging. I needed txting SO BADLY this weekend. Again, enter crit partners. They texted and texted and texted. Let me WHINE like a 2 yr old, sob like an idiot, and they soothed my proverbial brow via "Lol's" and "U Poor Ba-B's". 
3. My Husband. I have a 2 yr. old. And I'm 7.5 months pregnant. And I had deadlines. And I have a full time job. And ... well, your life probably has it's own lists of "ands" so insert yours, and we all know how the flu just ruins that mo-jo routine we have going to keep all those balls in the air. And, I'm not a natural born juggler. Enter DH. Gosh he's a dead wringer for those movie/book heroes we like to swoon over. He entertained a 2 yr old for four days, made suppers, did dishes, laundry, plumped pillows, tucked me in for naps, and made sure my laptop was buzzing along when I needed it. And, people wonder why I take my marriage vows seriously? HELLO!!! 

So ... I'm back on my feet. Deadlines are met. Crit partners have new posters up and they're not marred by dart pricks. My phone is still buzzing with texts because - let's face it - once you start you can't stop. AND DH deserves a steak dinner. Now ... if I only knew how to cook ...

Book Report: Heart's Safe Passage, by Laurie Alice Eakes

Okey dokey folks! One of my favorite authors is up today for review! Her new book, "Hearts Safe Passage" is .... TO DIE FOR! Well, not literally. I don't think Laurie would approve of me if I really enforced that concept. In fact, I'd probably not get asked to review a book again. But, for all sakes and purposes, she has written another masterful novel in my favorite, all-time, unpromoted, genre of Historical Romantic SUSPENSE. There is nothing better than a suspense novel filled with corsets, swashbuckling sailors, midwives, villains, and fights. Oh, and ships - or friggates - or whatever the proper terminology is.

Laurie has developed characters that are rich with background, character, humor, and spunk. Their interaction is fluid and entertaining, while you still become in ensnared by their emotional struggles. A rich depth of story adds more than just plot and suspense, but you truly care about each character.

Even the sub characters draw you in with their oddities. No two characters are cloned and it's great to see the diversity with which Laurie can create unique personalities. 

As in Book 1 of the series, "Lady in the Mist", Laurie continues the ongoing thread of midwifery. A fascinating topic that intrigues any history buff without going into so much detail that bores the mere story-reader. I loved the unvisited career of the Early American woman and it's so curious to me the nuances they had to address and deal with while giving birthing care.

All in all, "Hearts Safe Passage" is well worth the time and investment to have it on your book shelf for many re-reads to come. It is a standalone, so it's not necessary to read Book 1 to enjoy this - however, if you can have TWO Laurie Alice Eakes novels at your fingertips ... why wouldn't you? :)

Vlog: Crit Partners - Love, Hate, & Need

Yep. I knew it. It picked my drugged out face look as the freeze frame. Welcome to my Tuesday Vlog!! Hear my intelligent and genius opinions on crit partners, then share yours in the comments :)

Happy Tuesday!